Razzamatazz. Parasite City. Parasite Falls


The costly raspberries at AFC Wrexham, has left the club with a 3.67 million pound debt and rising, having minused 1.34 million pounds on the previous year’s balance sheets, time to trip over, equates to a 5.1 million hit. According to the Gospel, the club’s owners Ryan Reynolds and Rob McElhenney, they have loaned the club the 3.67 million pounds, as for the 1.34 figure has this sum been repaid? No clear window there. Reynolds stated that the club can refund the debt further down the Red Dragon ride, how? The minused out monies are locked under the banner of the ‘Wrexham Supporter’s Trust’, incorporating a shares portfolio to suggest with no legal standing, to follow on, no cover on a two timed owner’s bailout. The Good Ship Lollypop needs to keep sailing to sustain the Hollywood interest, if the treasures are sunken will that be the time for the club to drown? I hope not, the duo showcased genuine intent, rot warning signs can be switched on quickly as with any football club owners, ship ahoy.

Perhaps of concern is the land grabbing including the fixtures and fittings under the termed ‘freehold’, the complete package, to be under the WST? Is it wise to go down that road? Switch that warning sign on. At Championship club AFC Huddersfield Town, an American businessman Kevin Nagle is set to become the Terriers’ new owner, with one’s agenda to grab the freehold rights from the council and the Rugby League club Huddersfield Giants, who scrum down at the town as their home with the two owning 40 percent and 20 percent respectively. Will the Kirklees Council do the handover to Nagle? As is the case with many clubs beyond the Premiership leaseholds are set in place, to be breached? To the supporters, to go down that road is a dangerous window as the cliff’s edge approaches, crash, all clubs need protection. The Wrexham owners Reynolds and McElhenney seem of genuine intent, so to err on this side is a positive vibe, but nothing’s 100 percent, as Esther would say ‘That’s Life’.

The ballpark figures for a club at National League level are staggering, the owners have the platform, as the magician would say “I know all the tricks we can use to deal cards”. Wrexham’s income sources on match day, retail sales alongside advertising and sponsors revenue in 3.5 million pounds amazeballs on the figures. The club’s intended dream is to rip roar up the pyramid system, the pyramid is not a beast that will be slayed easily, if at all, link to article The Pyramid System, Glorification and the Calamitous, Jan 2022. The club is paying astronomical wages to facilitate the mindset, players dropping two divisions to cream the cake at a reported 5000 week wages for the more relevant impact play to achieve the results, rocket science money worked the oracle, Champions, promotion. Wrexham’s executive director Humphrey Kerr, quote “What you cannot have is rich owners paying massively”. The response, Manero, paying players two to three times the normal going rate alongside hugely inflated transfer fees are massive over payments, salary capping will lighten the creed. To transgress into the Dragon’s Den signposted ‘Agents Fees’ with 165,000 spent, running in second League Two club Stockport County, who breached out at 237,000 pounds, the cost of high maintenance players. Congratulations to AFC Wrexham on lifting the crown, the 2023 National League Champions.

Parasite City

To snapshot up state and top of that hit parade is the ‘Chelsea, Chelsea’, who spent 43 million pounds on agent’s fees, followed by Liverpool on 34 million, and Manchester United on 25 million pounds, the sums were paid on the team ethic. To burst through that dam came the juggernaut Manchester City, who lined one’s clutch of parasites who cling themselves to football clubs’ finances with a huge payout of 52 million pounds to Erling Haaland’s agent, father included on landing the rump steak, Haaland, what’s the beef? The Cadger Googoo’s, the jetsetters ‘Ohh to be an agent jetsetter’.

The biggest intake of players numbering out at one’s last count, thirty players of note, mind numbing, came Nottingham Forest’s way, who paid agent’s fees of a surprisingly paltry 4.5million pounds, by Premiership League standards. Forest’s purchase of relatively unknown players with non-proven quality to compete at the highest of levels, to shop in Aldi with regard to agent fees attached. According to the Football Association’s data, a total of 320 million pounds went out of football’s bank vaults, ‘daylight robbery’, no masks required, clear as day.

Parasite Falls

FIFA are clamping down on the football agents, enter agent regulation following on from FIFA de-frocking regulation in 2015, since then the parasites have been running amok, time to strip the industry bare. The new concept on the block, the need for the rogued to sit a FIFA endorsed one hour exam in order to operate with an agent’s licence, to fail the exam equals time to get shut at the ‘Parasites Fall’. En masse they came to the days ‘Parasite City’ aptly named for the day at the ExCel London centre of excellence. No excellence from the agents, with the projected figure of failure to peak out 80 percent. The parasite state has two thousand agents in the UK, adding to the total of six thousand and six hundred members worldwide, from one hundred and thirty eight member associations to sit the exam at various locations, at a cost of three hundred pounds a head. The snaked head of the FIFA to suck money into their six billion pound coffers on the exam payouts, a second exam be taken on initial failure to further line FIFA’s golden fleece.

The main topics to be covered on the papers will come under various headings, to follow, the legal system conflicts of interest, commission caps, agents disciplinary measures, the licensing system long and protracted. At Manchester City, Kevin De Bruyne negotiated his own contract with, to suggest, a local lawyer to cover and seal the finer details, the inserted clauses, lawyers of local township value has to be the answer, alongside clubs cutting out the middle men, the agents “We can see you playing tricks”, the salve to one of football’s ills, time for the agents to suck on a different green, the piped parasites, gagged and out.